Intestinal Strudel

Sweet apple innards

Sweet apple innards

If I’ve learned one lesson this past month, it’s to respect your digestive tube. The human body and what it’s able to accomplish is a wondrous thing. In fact, it’s something that should be celebrated — with intestinal strudel!

While meat is my favorite medium, I sometimes like to mix things up and use fruit or vegetables in my art. Plus, a tube meat digestive tube is really a bit too over the top, don’t you think? I based my creation on these puff pastry intestines, then josefiendafied it a notch.

Form the tubes

Form the tubes

For the intestine insides, I sliced Granny Smith (Where’s Granny? In mah belly, that’s where!) apples and added lots of sugar and cinnamon. I also used an entire bottle of neon green food coloring. Go big or go home. Also, I was making a double batch of intestines.

Then following the instructions in the puff pastry intestines recipe (see link above), I formed long strips of pastry, filled with the “tastes much better than it looks” cooked cinnamon apple mixture and doctored the sides together to form a nice seal. The green syrupy goodness from the cooked apples leaked out once cooked, so I recommend going full on med school to ensure your intestines are properly sealed so they don’t leak.

Delicately coiled intestine

Delicately coiled intestine

Once I had the tubes formed, I placed them atop parchment bases in glass baking pans.

How you shape the intestine is really up to you. I went with one fatter, less worldly version — something from a meat/potatoes sort of person who didn’t like to venture outside their food comfort zone very often.

I also created a larger, er, gathering place at the end of the intestine. Life-like authenticity is important.

Plus, I’m not quite sure what happened, but the length of each of the intestines varied by quite a lot. There’s something to be said about measure twice, cut once.

Hide a surprise in your intestine!

Hide a surprise in your intestine!

For the second intestine, I created a longer, bolder one, then added a wee surprise* at the very end. Everyone loves surprises and intestines are no different!

After basting the formed puff pastry with egg, I carefully painted red food coloring-based veins along the length of the intestines. I like to think it gives them a bit of added chutzpah!

I also painted the ends of the intestines bright red. I’m not entirely sure what my rationale was at the time, but I think I was again trying for authenticity and wanted to mark the ends where they’d be divorced from the stomach.

Also, I’m 99% sure that I cackled out loud numerous times as I was making these.

Scrumptious intestine!

Scrumptious intestine!

I wish I’d taken pictures of sliced pieces. Color aside, the apples were the perfect mix of sweet and cinnamon. And the puff pastry provided a nice backdrop to the apples.

* I dyed a peeled, hard-boiled egg green and placed it in the very bottom of the intestine. Why? Why not! Also farts sometimes smell like eggs. Remember: life-like art!

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